I was very happy to make it to QuakeCon. My heart was heavy with many positive emotions -- the kindness from strangers to make it possible, my passion for the game, my excitement to travel and compete once again, my ambition to win. I practiced relentlessly for this tournament, determined to satisfy my benefactors and prove myself.
Yet, here I am, struggling in my first match against dkt, down two games and playing a bleak third. Rage seethed through me like a torrential rapid, the fall imminent. I couldn't believe I was losing to this man. I'm playing so bad. This is not me. This is unforgivable.
I was swept away with the current to the point of no return. I lost, falling over the edge into waters unknown. Something strange happened during the descent. I felt nothing. Empty. It was over.
In spite of it all, I try to mask my failure respectfully. A moment of silence passed before I type "GG" and sent the message, unaware I had hit Caps Lock during my frustration in the second game. I was furiously tapping Tab to view the score after each respawn, as if a hidden. . .
No, best not to dwell on it. I look to the monitor, snapping back into reality. The console showed dkt returned my sportsmanship with a "gg" of his own. The hollow pit in my stomach began to fill with the worst of feelings. Regret. Depression.
Suddenly, something warm and moist assailed my ear. I jumped at the hissing whisper accompanying the sensation. What I heard will haunt me forever.
"Get a job."
I sat, stunned, for only a moment. Shaking off the stupor, I turned quickly to see the back of a bald head moving away from me at the leisurely pace of victory. That was the last time I played Quake, the last time I will ever play Quake.